Abnormally Skinny

Today was stressful. I realized I had a lot more work due the next three days than I counted for. And yet, I’m spending time writing a new post. It struck me today on how people wish they were skinny when a friend complained about how her jeans made her thighs look huge.

I’m skinny. But I’m not proud of it. Why? I’m too skinny. If you saw me, you’d think I was anorexic. But I’m not.

One of my best friends would say how she wished she was as skinny as me. One time she and another friend actually got mad when I told them that they wouldn’t be lucky. It was amusing now that I look back at it.

It really is not fun being this skinny. When you go somewhere out in public and guys look at you, you feel good about yourself like, “oh, I’m pretty.” For me, there’s always that big doubt that they’re looking at me because of my body size. It’s not a fun feeling. Nonetheless I enjoy flaunting what I got and being confident wherever I go. Because as my mom says, you won’t look so pathetic if you’re confident.

Another problem is that you can never get a clothing your size. It’s very rare. I want to wear skinny jeans and leggings. But that just shows how skinny my legs are.

Oh, and in case someone happens to be wondering: I eat my guts out. I pig out as much as I can. It’s just that sometimes I don’t have appetite. I try to force myself to eat, but apparently that’s not good for you. I eat so many junk food, oily food, anything. Doesn’t work. I probably have the highest metabolism ever. When I do gain weight, painfully slowly, I lose them right away if I don’t eat a lot during one meal.

It’s never fun to be my size. And I’m not happy the way my body is, as some people might assume. I hope other people try to see/realize what it’s like to be in someone’s, like me, shoes.

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