Jif the Peanut Butter

Okay guys, this is the last part in the update! This has nothing to do with Cheater and Psycho, but instead about this wonderful guy I met who I’m nicknaming Jif for now.

So I met him on Tinder, and we talked a lot and kind of hit it off pretty easily. He’s very easy to talk to and I really enjoyed his company over text. I met up with him and he was almost the opposite in real life. Fairly awkward and very quiet. I’m normally the listener, but in this instance I ended up being the talker which is surprising to me.

I thought it was because it was the first meeting, so I gave him the benefit of the doubt and met up with him a few more times. He still was like that. But for some reason, despite all that, I kept wanting to see him. Perhaps I saw some potential in him?

Later on, we were talking about it (through text) and he admitted that yes he still isn’t 100% comfortable or himself around me, but that it has nothing to do with me. He’s apparently like that with all girls he first meet and that usually he’s more like himself after sex. I didn’t take him too seriously, but after we did have sex I was pleasantly surprised to see how much more comfortable he was with me. He didn’t hesitate in touching me, he wasn’t awkward about it, and he talked a lot more (and comfortably) in the car when he was driving me home. I was like “well damn, he wasn’t kidding.” I’m seeing him on Tuesday, so I can’t wait to see more of his true self.

It was because of Jif I indirectly opened my eyes to the situation. I realized how much of an ass Cheater is and a player, whereas Jif is a normal, nice, genuine guy.

Honestly, I think part of the reason why I was heartbroken over Cheater was because I thought he was unique. That we were so alike and different at the same time. We both love Hans Zimmer, we both don’t drink, we’re both very creative, and the differences being that he’s narrow minded, I’m open minded, and others I can’t think about right now.

But then I met Jif and I realized that there really are other fish in the sea. We both have a lot of separate common interests/similarities too – we both love and play pokemon, we both love music in general, we’re both TOO nice of people (to the point they walk over us), and the differences being I’m more creative and he’s more of a business, structured guy and he drinks and I don’t.

I also thought that it was cool how Cheater and I began to say the same thing at the same time later in our relationship, but Jif and I are already at that telepathic level before even getting in a relationship and it’s creepily awesome.

I’m not saying I believe this is fate or something, but all of this helped me realize that Cheater wasn’t the only imperfect-perfect guy for me.

I loved Cheater a lot, probably more than any of my other ex’s. He was so full of flaws and infuriated me sometimes but goddamn he was the love of my life. Cheater also admitted that he thought about having a future with me and even considered marriage. This situation happening, though, shows that he’s not the guy for me and he lost his chance. I still get a bit sad thinking about all of our good, happy memories together… Even now I get a bit teary eyed. But in the end, I just see he’s a natural ass who doesn’t know how to take responsibility for a relationship.

That’s all in the updates, there will probably be more in the future most likely. Hope everyone has a great day :)

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4 thoughts on “Jif the Peanut Butter

  1. I’m glad to hear that you are doing great without the other guy. No woman deserves an asshole of that criteria. My question for you is, don’t you think it’s a bit unfair to your new guy that you still sometimes think of the old guy? I don’t mean to offend you or anything, it is just a simple question. The best advice I could give you right now is to let go(completely) of the former guy first. Don’t let your new relationship become a path to getting over the previous relationship. If you’re still hurting maybe you just need a bit more time to get over it. Best of luck to you.

    • Thank you for your comment, and it’s not at all offensive. It’s quite a sensible one, especially seeing how I’ve been out of my mind lately haha. I completely agree that it is unfair to the new guy that I still think of my old flame. But that’s why we’re taking things very slow, and he knows what has happened during the breakup and why (so he knows I’m kind of fresh off the boat in terms of emotions). Cheater and I had a year long relationship and it actually was filled with amazing memories so I guess it’s a bit tough for me to completely let go of him. I’m working through it though! Thank you for your advice, kind stranger :)

      • If you don’t mind, how long has it been with the new guy? Do you ever think of the former guy while you are with the current one? It’s astonishing how he has accepted that you are still not over the other. It truly says a lot about him, in a good way. I do understand that memories are pretty difficult to erase and we possibly never really erase them. You seem to have found yourself a good guy that should help you with creating even greater memories. You are very welcome haha (:

      • It’s been about two to three weeks now! Haha very new and I’m still getting to know him even more :) and actually I don’t think about Cheater at all whenever I’m talking to Jif – be it through text or in person. Sometimes I might see Cheater on a social media and that’ll cause me to remember some moments. But for the most part, all I feel is anger and such. I think I’m moving on just fine now that I think about it :) and yes! I’m looking forward to creating new memories with an actual genuine guy.

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